First Comes Marriage: My Not-So-Typical American Love Story by Huda Al-Marashi

First Comes Marriage: My Not-So-Typical American Love StoryFirst Comes Marriage: My Not-So-Typical American Love Story by Huda Al-Marashi
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

3.5 Stars. I listened to the audio on this one which was a nice way to enjoy this story. Another book club selection, it was a book that I may not have picked up otherwise. The memoir is meant to show you how young first generation immigrants navigate an American love story while balancing with the cultural pressures and expectations they are expected to follow.

In all honesty, I thought this was such an "American" love story that my overwhelming feelings throughout this book can be summed up in two ways: (1) I am SO glad I didn't have a daughter and (2) Man, we women sure can get in our damn way sometimes!

I found myself feeling sorry for Hadi, that poor guy just loved Huda and never doubted that he would marry her and that regardless of any "expectations" in his mind, it was a "love marriage." But Huda had spent her life watching American romantic comedies and building up her expectations of every step of her life from a dream proposal to a fairy tale wedding to life filled with marriage bliss. In reality, that shit doesn't happen!

I enjoyed Huda's blunt observations of her family and herself. This was really sort of a coming of age story more than anything. It did bring up some good questions - like can you get that "sweep you off your feet" feeling when you are never allowed to kiss or touch each other during your courtship? How do you dig yourself out from under all of the rules placed upon you as a teenager when suddenly they are different because you are married? At what point do you stop seeing only what you don't have and instead enjoy what you do have?

A fun read with a few laugh out loud moments. I am getting the opportunity to meet the author next week and look forward to hearing more about how her and her husband's relationship has changed since the time the story in the book ended.

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